“Hate” is a strong word and frankly, there’s too darn much of it in this world nowadays. That said, the “dislike index” just didn’t roll off the tongue quite as well. No one on the following list is wished any harm…perhaps some mental anguish inside the confines of a 60-minute football game or maybe the team bus breaking down outside Shell station with no working toilets. With one ROUNDLY disliked team coming to town this weekend for the last time in the foreseeable future, I thought it’d be wise to rank the teams on Boise State’s Mountain West slate OR part of a 13-year home-and-home on my own Buzzfeed-style list. Disagree? Well, I hate you too (just kidding, you’re very smart and likable and smell like sandalwood and sage)

12. Hawaii

I just can’t conjure up much hatred for the “braddahood”. There was a time when June Jones was scowling on the sidelines and Colt Brennan was passing for 450 yards that I didn’t necessarily LOVE the Warriors, but they haven’t posed much of a threat to the Broncos since George W. Bush was in office and since they are a football-only member of the MWC, they are spared my righteous anger.

11. UNLV

On the basketball court, there’s probably a tinge of disdain—like the kind I have for those late night catheter commercials—but the Rebels just haven’t been much of a threat to our Broncos since forever, and we also used to consider their old home field a home-away-from-home when we were wining all the Las Vegas Bowls.

10. San Jose State

Generally, I’ve felt pity for the Spartans…who we knew from a previous relationship…er…conference and frankly, them stomping on our midfield logo before Dan Hawkins went mega-Gandhi on them to the tune of 77 points was actually sort of endearing. Lately, they’ve had a pulse and even defeated the Broncos in our last appearance in the MWC title game. Their “never been here before” gloating was a little much, and put them a bit further up the rankings but no one thinks of these guys as a true rival yet…they are only 10th on the list,

9. New Mexico

I’ll be honest, this team would probably be a complete afterthought if it weren’t for one thing: 2015. At the time (thanks, UTEP) that home loss was considered by many to be the worst loss in the last 20 years…compounded by Bob Davie’s dumb face in a dumb team selfie on The Blue. This team is also rather annoying on the basketball court, so I’m giving them a spot inside the top ten.

8. Colorado State

The Rams have never beaten the Broncos on the field, so from that standpoint it’s ALL love. Their fans are Vandal-level @#$%-talkers though every year, even though they have ZERO reason to be. They are particularly fond of the old “academics’ barbs, which are the last refuge of teams that can’t beat you on the field. Their basketball program is mucho annoying and doggone it, this three shoulda counted

7. Wyoming

Wyoming isn’t a team that normally poses much of a threat and used to be a tune up game for the Broncos, but I must admit Principal Strickland has turned them into an annoying team…one that plays sound defense and usually stops our offense from getting too comfy. Their unis are ugly, their stadium causes nosebleeds, and seeing this gif fills me with a lot of rage. Seven it is.

6. Utah State

Again, my animus toward this team probably stems from the same season as the Lobos’—2015. Other than that, they’ve been harmless as kittens. Their excessive gloating over a MWC title last season was probably flag-worthy, but hey…the Broncos could’ve prevented that (not by beating Utah State…they already did that). On the court, probably a top 3 hateworthy team in the conference.

5. Fresno State

Another WAC holdover. I can’t be TOO mad at the Bulldogs, they pretty much MADE us, but their title win in 2018 on The Blue still sticks in the craw and their battery-chucking fanbase makes them considerably less cuddly than other foes. We have a long history with the Bulldogs, and most of it is filled with Bronco victories, but man those few losses were INOPPORTUNE and we might see them again this year if both teams play their cards right.

4. Air Force

I love our armed forces—let me get that out of the way. I HATE the triple option. Like, I seriously loathe it…and just look at the walking wounded (and season enders) we had last week because of that special, special offense we face every damn year. That, and Troy Calhoun is a turd and no amount of pre-game Lou Holtzing will change my mind on that.

3. San Diego State

You’d think my distaste for the Aztecs would have waned once Rocky Long left—not much. Brady Hoke is another unsavory character in San Diego and the Aztecs hold more than one “how’d they win that?” type of win over the Broncos in the last decade. Bashing their butts last month on The Blue felt really, really good.

2. Nevada

The hatred of the Wolf Pack goes all the way back to the Big Sky days and their string of contemptible coaches really sealed the deal. 2010 will live in infamy as probably the most consequential loss in Boise State history and seeing that elf Chris Ault sets off my heart rate monitor on my watch. Add in that they scored a b-ball coach who never set foot in a high school and couldn’t keep his shirt on (Muss now at Arkansas and still afraid of high schools) and Nevada is a team that could lose every game and I’d laugh and laugh. Oh, how I’d laugh.

1. BYU

This probably isn’t a huge surprise as they are the team that spurred this list from the start, but I rather dislike this southern neighbor of ours. Forget the head-to-head recruiting wars, the seesaw series (of late), or any religious matters…I just don’t like BYU. Their fanbase is uncommonly delusional, and the team is filled with nut-punchers and cheap shotters. Them getting into the Big 12 punched the jealousy part of a few upper thighs in Boise as well. This is the only acceptable remaining loss on the Bronco schedule, but try convincing my heart of that. BYU could play Idaho and darn it, I might just root for the “Tribe from the North”…someone help.